Thursday, August 1, 2013
All my life I thought I wanted a craftsman house. And when I couldn't afford one, I told the real estate agent, "Just find me some ancient damned squat in Altadena that I can buy for $10 and some groupons."
So that's what I got. But it turns out, that's not what I want at all. I don't want cozy; I don't want eaves, and dark living rooms, and plumbing problems. I want sleek. I want spare. I want mid-century modern.
When I tell this to friends, you know, about the volte-face in my aesthetics, they say, "Don't you find, that our tastes change as we get older..."
And that sort of response makes me so mad I jump up and down until I dislodge my artificial hip and lose my dentures. No, it's not because I got older -- you guys did, and I'm really sorry about that, boo-hoo. But the reason I want midcentury modern is because ... wait, where was I, now I forgot what I was saying...
Oh, hell, it doesn't matter. But I'm soliciting volunteers to launch a Kickstarter for me so I can get this:
In return, well, I'm all out of groupons, but there's some Ralph's coupons I stashed away, and they're worth double on Wednesdays.