Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Small Favors on Facebook

You know what makes me mad?

Every time, every fucking time someone refers to my blog, says something nice about my blog, on Facebook, he or she gets one weak, limp, wizened "thumbs up" in response. You know how embarrassing that is?

It's like running for 6th-grade student council all over again.

What, you -- you lone thumb in the wilderness -- voted for me because your mom is friends with my mom and she made you do it?

As for the rest, apparently it goes against your deepest, strictest principles to click bloody Like. It's really that hard to drag the mouse a few centimeters and press the button?

Granted, Like offers no qualifications. No Sorta, Kinda, Maybe if I'm Drunk. But people, it's not going on your resume.

Everyone else I know on Facebook can say something such as, "I love trees!" and they can count on 50 Likes and 30 comments. I write 400 words and get the single digit.

Don't think this goes unnoticed. I'm counting heads and taking names.

46 comments:

  1. Like.
    Like Goats.

    Wow. That goat thread was longer that Kim Kardashian's Marriage.

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  2. I may be guilty. I feel guilty. But I have no idea what you're accusing me of. Nevertheless, I'm so, so sorry for what I've done.

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  3. You need to swap out your default FB silhouette. No one likes it

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  4. Grudges! Yes! I LIKE THOSE! Plenty of thumbs up there---where do I click?

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  5. I'm so sorry, I'm lousy at Facebook. Partly for the reasons you have so eloquently outlined here.

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  6. Yeah? I'm not on (into) FB.

    When we were kids in Denver (I lived there a coupla years) "like" was a substitute for "love". Naw, wait, it was St. Paul, late 60's. That makes more sense - a more pragmatic, stoic and low-key endorsement of who you fancied and favored in the infancy of our experimentation in the dating game. This jibes with my Dad's account of the city and region as a whole: "As the big bands used to tour through the midwest, they'd say there was nothing more boring as St. Paul or Easter week" on their schedule. This may still hold true to some extent. Conversely, if a person was not cool or in disfavor they were labeled to be "sad".
    Maybe the little buttons should offer "Love" or "Hate" as an option. This might inspire people to action, to actually do something, much as a stay at home mom attending a local Occupy rally abandoning domestication for a day, throwing down the rags and pots and pans, a quick once-over with a vaccum cleaner on the cat, dusting off little Billie to the babysitter next door, to become involved in an emotional movement or display her true feelings of distaste for the "Man". Something, you know, dramatic, taking a stand one way or the other, for good or bad. Though, what would the results be?
    A quick sound-byte on the nightly news, your picture in the Paper, being hauled off to the pokey? That's a lot of involvement . . . I think I'll just watch the news.

    You're doing a good job.

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  7. rotflmao.

    ever since the last big update of fb, I'm not doing much out there, unless I'm stuck in some long line, bored out of my gourd.

    but, you know, like, I'll like whatever, you know, like, you want me to like, you know, like, if like, you know, I think I like, like it, you know?

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  8. Check your mail, I sent you a Like.

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  9. I feel your pain. Those Fbkrs!!
    You know who you are.
    Now send some love n comments KB's way. Or at least like her!

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  10. I better go add you as a friend so I can like you even more :)

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  11. this is one of the moments where I can feel like I'm better than other people because I'm not on Facebook :)

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  12. Oh, as if life weren't tough enough already. Ron put up a Facebook post for me but I didn't even get the finger.

    I'm toying with a few ideas for my first timid entry into Facebook: "I prefer air without particulate matter!" and "Puppies are nice!" Envision the Likes multiplying like bunnies.

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  13. A Guy That's Liking YouNovember 2, 2011 at 7:04 PM

    I love it when you throw in an F-Bomb. No one does it better than you do. Damn! I only wish I had "known" you way before this.

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  14. I just sent you a FB friend request (I could tell it was you by your photo) and I'll be devastated if you don't accept. I don't want to be accused of lazy liking if we're not friends first!

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  15. I'm with Bellis, I think. I'm not sure.

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  16. This from the woman who regularly gets over 30 comments per post.

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  17. If you're not part of the solution, Margaret, you're part of the problem. When is the last time you Liked me? I rest my case.

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  18. And it's even worse for the FB page I set up for my book. It actually has the nerve to post the ratio of impressions to comments under each photo. Latest photo - aprox. 300 impressions (visits?) which merited a whooping 1.5% in the way of comments.

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  19. It's all in the marketing, Kevin. How about you label each photo with something like "Leave a comment and save a life." Or "One tree will be planted for every comment I receive."

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  20. Karin, excuse me, have you commented on my most recent Patch piece? Have you *liked* it? If you're not going to like my big fat piece I'm not going to like your big fat piece, so there.

    Networking is giving, pal. Giving!

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  21. Nobody reads my dribble. (sniff)

    I'm a downer!

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  22. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2bzU77zGDlI&feature=relmfu

    I really, really like you. Really, I do.

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  23. And don't get me started on Mr. Earl. He puts up some Facebook message about some baseball team, Dodgers or Clippers or whatever, and gets hundreds of single finger salutes. Well, bully for you, Mr. Popular.

    (Kenny Mac. I know. Everyone does. It's a curse.)

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  24. *Like*.

    Totally.

    Now, if only I were on facebook to click the like button.

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  25. I'm really sorry! I don't know exactly what I did wrong, but I'm on bended knee, hoping for a pat on the head and not an axe...

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  26. I am not in the Facebook.
    Blogger absorb my time...

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  27. Hold it! Was that a proposal? On bended knee? Or, wounded knees? Or, could I be more offensive?

    Why yes, I could be more offensive. I've been married almost ten years. To three different men for three years each.

    Which is why number four escapes me.

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  28. A paste from Facebook:



    henry miller
    My people were entirely Nordic, which is to say idiots. (henry miller)
    Like · · Share · 210 · 3 minutes ago ·

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  29. If I ever see your posts floating around my facebook page, you know I'll Like it several hundred times...can I actually do that?

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  30. You're on facebook too? Oh that damn "Like" button. That stupid dreaded word, like that every teenagers/collegiate student uses like in every fourth word. Now it is a damn button. sigh

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  31. Actually, I was talking about people who post about me on Facebook, and the dismal response they get.

    But yeah, I'm on Facebook, but I've never posted anything. Except one time when I was hacked I posted to say if they see a post from me it's not mine.

    (I know that line, PI. It's one of the Tropics -- Capricorn?)

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  32. Hey, while we're talking *likes* perhaps everyone could go to fb and *like* Adopt Louise:
    http://www.facebook.com/adoptlouise

    It was Hiker's idea to create a fb page for Louise. She will like it if you like it.

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  33. There are worse digits Hiker. And for the record, I don't LIKE your work............ I WUV it . Where's the finger for that one?
    V

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  34. Uh oh...I missed it. Two thumbs up.

    What am I voting for, again...?

    I like bunnies, if that counts for anything.

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  35. Put up a photo of the famous Alou brothers of San Francisco Giants lore and get 18 Likes. (But I guess it pays to know your audience!) ;-)

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  36. Even I would give thumbs up to the Alou Bros., and I'm a Dodgers fan. I tend to favor the two-legged over the four...stupid and heartless of me, I know.

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  37. Hey, Karin - you're on FB? But no profile pic yet? I'll look you up and send you a friend request. Fair warning, though - I'm a serial, trigger-happy liker...

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