If there’s one thing on which all the news outlets – left, right, center, north, south, over, under; PBS, PRI, CNN, MSNBC, FOX, KPCC, BBC, WSJ -- agree, it’s that we’re going to hell in a handbasket.
Given that’s the case, I’d like to suggest some modifications to the handbasket.
I want a double-wide, with air conditioning and safety features. Shelving for essentials such as deodorant, moist towelettes, mascara, spring water, scotch, and sunscreen. A compartment for my boxer’s Senior “I Can’t Believe It’s Not Dead” canned food. A compartment for my boxer (she won’t mind if it’s dark, she’s old and will sleep the whole way, but I don’t like to travel alone).
Then there’s the handbasket material itself. Wicker gives me waffle butt. I’m thinking something with upholstery and daisies.
As for electronic accessories, we can eliminate GPS, which would only say, “Go straight to, go straight to, go straight to…”
This just might be a cottage industry if I hurry.