Friday, February 18, 2011

Homestead of Urban

Participants in the urban homesteading movement are reacting strongly to a move by …[a] family in Pasadena to trademark the term "urban homestead" and related terms and require Facebook to take down pages on the topic.--LA Observed

Ok, first let me say, we appreciate your donations and support, and the loyalty you’ve shown our little tax deductible enterprise over the years.

Gosh, I don’t have to tell you how distressing all this brouhaha has been. This morning, I grew, picked, dried, and brewed a cup of chamomile, sheared a sheep, spun some wool, knit my slippers, wrapped myself in Grandma’s hand stitched quilt, and carried a candle to my Apple iMac 27" 2.8GHz Quad Core Computer MC511LL/A.

I just wanted to reach out to you and say, “Yes, perhaps we sue. But we sue because we care. We sue with great love® and affection, our bonnets held high. My family and family alone are UH's, but you can be something, too. Something far, far less, but better than nothing. Maybe.”

If you say UH, we say UH-UH.

In our defense, you backed us into a corner, and after we offered a number of alternatives. Before we took down the Facebook page “Keewanee Urban Homestead,” we offered them,“Structures and vegetable gardens using compost and no insecticides within the perimeters of incorporated areas of the Midwest,” for example.

All right. Enough. Least said, soonest mended.® (I wasn’t the first to say that, but the first to give it meaning.)

On to some good news.

Your tax deductible contributions have not been wasted. Not only do we drive a biodiesel van, we always take the short cut to our lawyer’s office. And he thinks we’re this close to owning Truth, Justice, and the American Way. As for Mom® and Apple Pie® , let me quote that great American Joan Crawford and say, “Don’t fuck with me, gentlemen.”

Oh, but I’m still sad, even as I throw another log on the woodburning stove. Thank god our next in a series of UH outreach missionary trips to Tuscany is only a week away.

As a scholar of great literature, both English and American ®, in the face of this unjustified adversity, I find solace and comfort in the classics I studied as a child. I’ll never forget Little House on the Prairie when Pa said, “Hard workin' folks only smell bad to some folks who have nothing better to do but stick their noses in the air.”

Michael Landon could always make me cry.

110 comments:

  1. Dear Ms. Bugge:

    I represent a client who has trademarked and patented many of the words and phrases you have appropriated in your column today. You now own my client $11, 342.00, which accrues interest daily. Please remit the full amount, plus interest to the undersigned. We suggest that to avoid incurring further fees in the future that you cease and desist communicating.

    A. J. Calhoun, Esq

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ok, 1st lemme say, is it against law to mention the name of this Pasadena family? Are you afraid of being sued, haha?? I know their name & a tiny bit of the background - which is the only reason this made any sense to me, LoL!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think it's outrageous that people are allowed to trademark phrases that are already in the language. Laker coach Pat Riley trademarked "Three-Peat" even though Michael Cooper coined the phrase. That should not be allowed. In case you were wondering, I already own "Fuck You".

    WV: sustslit. Trademark that!

    ReplyDelete
  4. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I wasn't getting it at first. Once I read it from the start again, I got it...

    I seem to remember something on 20/20 or 60 minutes that was about "urban homesteading" in blighted areas in NY, Chicago, or Detroit. Rooftop gardens, all green, the whole works.

    You have managed (as always) to have a hilarious take and bring some sanity to a crazy subject.

    ReplyDelete
  6. urban homestead
    urban homestead
    urban homestead

    And they can kiss my ass®.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I know, Mr. Tillet. It was probably too obscure, but I don't want to get sued. CP guessed it.

    Earl, I just read urban homestead is on its way to court.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You know that Waton computer they had on Jeopardy? I'm taking that thing down to the trademark office and trademark ever damn thing in it.

    Let's TP their urban homestead.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Paula is being very funny on my Facebook page.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Attention People of Earth:

    I'm trademarking every letter of every alphabet, as well as all the numbers, all the punctuation marks AND all the empty spaces so Fuck You®.

    Sincerely® yours®,

    The Urbane Farmer

    ReplyDelete
  11. Paula, do you still blog down in Pensacocacola or has that been outlawed??

    ReplyDelete
  12. Notice that's why I typed, Pensacocacola!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Je ne parle pas anglais encore. Maintenant, je parle francais.

    ferme urbaine
    ferme urbaine
    ferme urbaine

    Me poursuivre en justice!

    ReplyDelete
  14. I'm tempted to translate P's "french" for those in our loco area:

    나는 아직 영어를 못해. 자, 난 프랑스어를 구사합니다.

    도시 농장
    도시 농장
    도시 농장

    날 고소해!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Cafe is tres gentil, but I think he's in trouble for the cocacola part of Pensacococola. I'd never heard of Urban Homesteading until now, KB, so I think someone owes you something in affiliate marketing fees.

    ReplyDelete
  16. While they're at it, they should think about patenting the homestead and everything in it.

    ReplyDelete
  17. I came back to apologize for my crudeness. It seemed funny at the time. Oh well.

    I hope someone else copyrights their family name, that'll fix 'em.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Path to Freedom as well?? (Try it in google and wiki.) Where was Homeland Language Security when our everyday words were being hijacked? I take full responsibility for this post and will pay all fees incurred for using any of the words in these sentences.

    ReplyDelete
  19. “howdy neighbour, mind if I shoot you?”

    ReplyDelete
  20. It was, is, and forever shall be funny, Paula. But I can't talk now; I'm busy trademarking Trademark, seeing as Earl has cornered leather.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Utterly Hysterical
    Unbelievably Hypocritical

    ReplyDelete
  22. I imagine now they're huddling about Plan B.

    ReplyDelete
  23. All so deliciously funny and so right on. I think I'll trademark the words "store" and "shop" and try to shut down any other entity that uses them....that'll sure reduce the competition, eh? I think I'll trademark the term "wingnut" while I'm at it....

    ReplyDelete
  24. If I recall Wally Amos who founded Famous Amos cookies was kicked out of the company when it went public or his private shares in the company dropped below 50% (or something like that). He tried to start up a new company using the Famous Amos brand and was blocked! He could not use his own name anymore. He came up with "Uncle Noname Cookies" (uncle no name). I dont see them for sale anymore though.

    Dear Dervaes, Your silence is deafening.

    ReplyDelete
  25. I've filed to trademark spewing!!!

    Damn...what's the best way to get coffee off my iMac monitor???

    ReplyDelete
  26. Following your positive influence
    I just trademarked my CP.
    Then I went ahead to also TM'd Jean's Paintings, Mister Earl, Mr. Earl, Altadena Hiker, 1st 2nd 3rd & et al Acts in Altadena, Glimpses of South Pasadena, Pasadena PIO, , Overdog, Boz, Pasadena Adjacent, Palm Axis, The Chieftess, Finnegan Begin(s) Again(s), The Restless Chef, Tiger Mom, Avenue to the Sky Lake Avenue Pasadena, Altadena Blog, Pasadena 91105 & Beyond, Pasadena Sub-Rosa, What's for Meat, Jean's Paintings, Pasadena Poop, Pasadena Daily Photo, Webster's Fine Stationer's Blog, This Guy is Big in Pasadena, Miss Janey's Place, Pasadena Views, Susan's Life with Tommy (and any other guys), and Blog John Does 1-infinitum.

    Problem with that? Well, as Petrea has said: you can go kiss her ass - so go sue her!!

    ReplyDelete
  27. Ooooh, I couldn't wait for your take on this. But no mention of the cultishness? I want to see the cult + trademark slamdunk!

    ReplyDelete
  28. Damn it Cafe!!! I just got my computer screen free of earlier spewing....

    LOL!!!

    ReplyDelete
  29. If they can't trademark Urban Homestead, perhaps Pretentious Hippies will suffice? Personally, I am suing all of you for personal injury. I think I pulled a muscle laughing on this one.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hmmmm...Laurie...good idea...I suppose I could have a case for coffee spewed on computer screen...what do you think Mr E???

    ReplyDelete
  31. CP, how dare you take all my future blog names about all the guys and dogs that are yet to come into my life!

    I'm impressed with everyone's successful rush to trademark but before you get any more ideas, they® have also trademarked:
    URBAN HOMESTEAD®, URBAN HOMESTEADING®, PATH TO FREEDOM®, GROW THE FUTURE®, HOMEGROWN REVOLUTION®, FREEDOM GARDENS®, LITTLE HOMESTEAD IN THE CITY®

    According to this article: http://technorati.com/business/article/the-green-movement-trademarking-controversy-and/#ixzz1ERNSxtkG

    ReplyDelete
  32. Chieftess: I say you assume the risk when you drink coffee while reading the blogs.

    ReplyDelete
  33. WV: hawlen

    That's what these urban homesteaders are doing with this lawsuit.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Ah dayam!!! What's with this personal responsibility thing???

    ReplyDelete
  35. Cafe: Since you neglected to trademark View, I will move ahead(TM) on it ASAP(TM):
    View(TM)

    Let me know how you View(TM) this.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Guess I better get my butt in gear and register Rural Homesteader eh?

    ReplyDelete
  37. I guess I could "research" this to find out what the hell everyone is talking about. But I think I'll just offer that maybe SoCalians need spring.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Banjo...you got me with that one!!! Clean computer though..no coffee!!! I take my personal responsibility

    ReplyDelete
  39. Oh Linda and Marjie trademark everything before it's too late. I've recently submitted house, window, and spoon. Waiting for a positive verdict.

    ReplyDelete
  40. I'm enjoying this so much.

    I'm trademarking my WV, which is "nopas." It's the rough part of town in the dena.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Banjo: I own SoCalians® now. I'm sure you understand.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Shanna, I didn't trade mark your The View cuz I figured it was already trademarked - by someone else!

    ReplyDelete
  43. Whaaa? (TM) I sense that something is rotten in the state of Denmark...

    ReplyDelete
  44. Thanks® Hiker®,® I® know® that® sometimes® I® get® carried® away®.

    CP, I'll be back, kiddo.

    B52, it's the weather fer shur.

    ReplyDelete
  45. Oh! Oh! Oh! I have dibs on "something is rotten in the state of Denmark"

    ReplyDelete
  46. As if (TM). I already trademarked Hamlet. You, Camissonia, and the entire Royal Shakespearean Company can expect a Cease and Desist on Monday. Check your mailbox (tm).

    ReplyDelete
  47. Surely thou hast driven the "Royal Shakespearean Company" shaking hence.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Yup, until the last syllable of recorded time -- but that's a ballpark figure (tm).

    ReplyDelete
  49. Cafe: "Surely thou dost jest."

    Quoted with permission of and courtesy of
    - Wm. Shakespeare.
    All rights reserved.

    ReplyDelete
  50. Cease & desist? Well, don't you know that Rosencrantz and Guildenstern (tm) are dead already?!!

    ReplyDelete
  51. Don’t touch my D®.

    D.

    ReplyDelete
  52. Do you say Hello® when you answer the phone? Not without paying me, you don't.

    ReplyDelete
  53. AH, I think you should hold out for a hundred comments. Fun(ny) stuff here. Then again, there's usually funny stuff here.

    ReplyDelete
  54. Earl, Paula already had Hello® a couple of days ago. She also has Goodbye®.

    ReplyDelete
  55. I'd better TM:
    Homestead of Suburban
    Homestead of Suburbia
    Homestead of the Suburbs
    Suburban Homestead
    Suburbia Homestead
    Suburb Homestead
    and Homestead John Does 1-99!

    Before any of you humanoids gets any crazy ideas.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I may as well also trademark this one since it seems to be gaining popularity:

    Take Back Urban Home-steading(s) , and all similar versions of it.

    ReplyDelete
  57. I'm trademarking Cafe Pasadena...Cafe Altadena, Cafe South Pasadena, Cafe Glendale....

    ReplyDelete
  58. I already TM's CPas, ChiefTess. But, can't imagine anybody cares about the others. So you can have them.

    Btw, I already TM'd The Chiefess, but I'll let you have it for $1.99. You can also have The Chief - don't know who wood want that one anyway!!

    ReplyDelete
  59. Dayam!!! How'd I miss those two??? I think I have $1.99...will you take it all in pennies???

    ReplyDelete
  60. OMFG....!

    at least I've learned not to drink or eat while reading posts or comments! (hint, Chieftess)

    Paula---STILL funny, but is it ok if I use "FU" instead without paying the TM fee? Or must I use one of the other 15 or so languages I know those words in to avoid the fee? Cuz...just saying, I'm a little short on cash at the moment and my, uhm, slightly overuse of those words WILL eat up my budget...quickly.

    and Petrea...was that kiss® my® ass® inclusive, or just *your* ass® is TM? If the latter, did the application include photos, or a field trip to show said item to the TM folks?

    I had to look up the originating info as well...but remember hearing something about all this silliness. I think their location so close to the fwy has allowed them to inhale too many fumes and think too highly of themselves and their fricken TM.

    my WV? grapp...I think these idiots need to get a grapp of themselves...similar to a grip, but more foreceful and for those unable to be in touch with reality, an extra "p" thrown in to avoid nasty lawsuits!

    ReplyDelete
  61. Trish, I hereby officially license all of my trademarked letters, numbers, punctuation marks, spaces AND combinations thereof under Creative Commons, so "knock yourself out"®. Which is nicer that FU® which is, as we all know, owned by Mr Earl®.

    Learn more (than the Dervaes Family® did) here:

    http://creativecommons.org/licenses/

    ReplyDelete
  62. Jules Dervaes'(s) wall on FeeBee is open, worth a peek:

    http://www.facebook.com/#!/julesdervaes?sk=wall

    Bonus question: What is the plural of Mercedes?

    ReplyDelete
  63. Too late. All letters and combinations thereof, are taken. And you might want to cut back on photos with snow in them. Karin just copyrighted that.

    ReplyDelete
  64. Dayam!!! I'll TM snow on trees...and sunsets...

    ReplyDelete
  65. Raindrops on roses,
    And whiskers on kittens,
    Bright copper kettles
    And warm woolen mittens,
    Brown paper packages
    Tied up with string,
    These are a few of my trade- marked things.

    When you think that
    You've had a brainstorm
    And your fortune is had
    Simply remember my trademarked things
    And crawl back home feeling bad

    ® (c) 2011 All rights reserved.
    RMR

    ReplyDelete
  66. Awww, Mr Earl, I bet you feel pretty, dontcha?

    ReplyDelete
  67. Dayam! Mr. E!!! I am so glad I wasn't eating or drinking anything when I read that!!!! And then there's Paula...

    ReplyDelete
  68. Chieftess: Nope TM. I own Sunsets TM and Skies TM. See VIEW TM asapTM.
    All material Protected by copywrong TM laws.

    ReplyDelete
  69. Oh god, this urban homestead urban homestead urban homestead story is the gift that keeps on giving(tm).

    ReplyDelete
  70. Petrea: That's what happens when the legal system gets involved.

    ReplyDelete
  71. Mr Earl and I are working on a scheme to trademark actual entities, like all kittens or, even better, all raindrops! (Sorry Chieftess).

    ReplyDelete
  72. Those Pretentious Hippies™ have always bugged me. Aren't any of those grown adult children going to move off that REMOVED DUE TO TRADEMARK RESTRICTION? I can't help but be reminded of that "Brother's Keeper" movie.

    ReplyDelete
  73. LOL...I've had a particularly difficult last week+ and have to say, this has got me in a better mood. If only it didn't have the truth behind it, it might be funnier!

    and Petrea---you didn't answer...was that inclusive or individual and did you get a field trip out of the deal? ;-)

    I like the plural of Mercedes Mister Earl...only other option would be "if you have to ask, then you don't have the money to afford two, or more of them"

    and the sillier this gets..the more I'm reminded of most 2 year olds, or the movie Nemo...mine, mine, mine, mine, mine, mine...one would think these folks would have grown up a bit...guess snot...


    wv: botier...plural of booty? or, the spelling of "more better booty than yours"?

    ReplyDelete
  74. Trish: Petrea doesn't have legal access to the words to properly answer you. (under advice of MrEarl's atty AJ Calhoun, esq)

    ReplyDelete
  75. I feel like writing this family who will remain nameless a letter. It will begin with: WTF®

    ReplyDelete
  76. Cafe...oh, lord...I suppose Calhoun will waste time chasing us for the cash? cuz I know we're all just rolling in it...;-)

    Susan...you write the letter, we'll all sign it!

    wv: pasedndhic---what one turns into when one has had too many drinks at lunch and tries to trademark everything one sees or touches

    ReplyDelete
  77. Susan: It will probably be the thousandth letter they get. The Dervaes are under heavy attack for this. Apparently, the trademark office was not easily convinced that they qualified, and I suspect that if they do take anyone to court, they will not be 100% successful. For example, there is a book called Urban Homestead that was published in 2008. The Dervaes didn't receive their trademark till 2010. Pretty tough to argue that the 2008 book infringed, although its authors received a cease and desist letter and Facebook took their page down. Enforcing this trademark of a 40- year-old term may cause significant damage to the Dervaes' reputation - much more damage than the Dervaes bargained for.

    ReplyDelete
  78. What!!! No more pictures of snow?!!

    ReplyDelete
  79. I'm laying claim to fog!!

    wv: "sesce" and desist

    ReplyDelete
  80. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  81. Thanks for answering for me, Cafe. I've forgotten the question.

    ReplyDelete
  82. What was it that this post was about???

    ReplyDelete
  83. It was about a private family matter, ChiefTess.

    ReplyDelete
  84. You did not knit your own socks.

    ReplyDelete
  85. Whew!!! Margaret...you're awesome (TM)!!!

    ReplyDelete
  86. I have no words except: I adore you. Thanks for making me practically fall out of my chair laughing.

    ReplyDelete
  87. Congratulations, Karin, on breaking the century mark!

    ReplyDelete
  88. Oh ho, don't think I don't know what a few of you were up to -- prying your eyes open with toothpicks to keep this string going into the wee hours. And I think we've copywrited every language except...except...Hungarian! Mwahahaha, it's all mine.

    WV:Mynset

    ReplyDelete
  89. Wow, even Professor MARGARET commented on this post!! This must have been either xxcellent writing or made absolutely no sense to her.

    ReplyDelete
  90. wait wait wait...
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה
    עירוני הנחלה


    oh, just google translate it

    ReplyDelete
  91. Can't see any icelandic.

    D.

    ReplyDelete
  92. The only thing trademark this family has earned is their conceit and arrogance.

    I am not surprised. They have always been a presumptuous bunch...all snooty about farming, as if they were the first to grow vegetables in their back yard.

    How original.

    ReplyDelete
  93. A guy on the NY Jets announced today that he trademarked, "Can't Wait" an original phrase that he coined during an interview.

    ReplyDelete