Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Damn, just when you think things can’t get any worse. And I was having such a good time, just my plastic dry cleaner bag and me. Whooping it up, we were. As soon as you find an economical source of fun, one person has to ruin it for everyone. And there’s an American flag on the bag, so this is probably part of the Constitution or something.
While considering other party game options, I wrapped my head in a plastic newspaper bag and what do you think? Printing as large as life: Warning: May cause suffocation.
Ever in search of a good time, I was going to spray some Raid down my throat, and whoa cowgirl – guess what? It’s harmful if swallowed AND I can’t spray it in my eyes, which was my second choice. See? One person. Ruin it. Everyone.
So I bought a pack of cigarettes, but I’m not stupid. Even without the warning label, I know not to inhale. The plan is to stick the lit end in my ear, and there’s nothing on the label about THAT, so let the good times roll.