Sunday, October 12, 2008

Theory of gross(ery) relativity

Ok, bear with me on this -- it will only take a minute. I bought a few items at Ralphs, including a bunch of asparagus. The checker must have stowed the asparagus in a separate bag -- separate from all the other vegetables for god knows what reason -- and I didn't notice. So I picked up one bag and not the elusive second. I get home and start looking for the asparagus.

Did it fall out in the car? no. Did a dog pluck it out? no. Did I, like, put it in the closet with my coat or something? I search everywhere, getting more and more furious. Finally I have to face the painful fact I'm financially and gastronomically out one bunch of asparagus.

And here is where Einstein comes in. Maybe we all lost 1/4 of our net worth last week in the stock market. One quarter of our life's blood is gone, but I can't quite comprehend the magnitude, the implication of such a loss.

Sadly, however, $3 in vegetables, that I understand.

(I could illustrate this post with a stunningly well lit plate of roasted asparagus sparkling with drops of butter and salt, but well, you know...yes we have no asparagus, we have no asparagus today.)


  1. I would lose my mind if I lost my asparagus like that! If If had a mind to lose.

  2. Asparagus is a fav.
    lost your asparagus, mh? i got one 4 u.

    Who said we dogs don't like veggies.

  3. I agree. Last month the bagger at K Mart put each item in a separate bag resulting in many more bags than I had hands. When I got home I did not have my grapefruit juice. I have been boycotting K Mart ever since.

  4. What about substituting asparagus with zucchini? I call the market afterwards and then pick up missing item later (Vons and Ralphs). Trader Joes will do nearly anything for you.

  5. I must really be emotional because this post actually made me cry.

    You have such a knack for getting right to the gist of things. Please write a novel. Like... NOW.

  6. K, I'm having 2 much fun eatin, & readin other blogs to be concerned with takin pics.

    On 2nd thought, I'm meeting some girlfriends @ my Auntie Eim's cafe @ Eagle rock (and roll?) this week so maybe i'll put the cam on a leash.

    Besides, i'm too busy & just a lazy dog.

  7. (I thought I left a comment earlier, but it didn't come through.)

    Altadena Ralph's? Oh, I avoid that place like the plague. Dirty shopping carts, lousy service, poor selection, high-priced produce.

    I highly recommend the new Super King Market at Lincoln Square. Everything is fresh and new and they're practically giving away the produce.

  8. I had no idea my lecture on economics would resonate with anyone. Ah Laurie, don't cry (and I guess you are really emotional right now, but then, who isn't?)And Susan, it was the Ralph's in Flintridge, but thanks for the tip.

  9. What a perfect picture of loss and the economy. I'm sure the decision to spend $3 on asparagus was a conscious one too, an indulgence even. Sorry, my friend.

    On an unrelated note, my blog's spamguard for whatever reason decided that your wonderfully funny comments on the salmon salad post were spam. Whoever was responsible for this oversight has been sacked. My apologies. Your comments are now up.

  10. When your asparagus DOES make it home with you..... forget the Hollandaise... lemon butter is great too!