I don't have a kelly green thumb, but I do consider it belongs in the green spectrum -- maybe celadon. So I don't understand why certain plants --everyday, ordinary, get at Home Depot plants -- commit suicide after less than a year in my yard. What profound sense of hopelessness do they find in this corner of Altadena that makes them refuse food and water, and instead, choose to hit the dirt face down.
For example, the kamakazi-like Japanese Maple.
Yes, I gave it acid soil. Yes, it was never allowed to dry out. On the hottest days of summer, I even misted the ungrateful bitch. I'll give this pot a kick and move on.
The princess flower. Such a lovely name. She shot up quickly, was actually taller than any other of her kind I've ever seen. Well, live fast, die young, and leave a corpse of some sort, they say.
The butterfly bush. This is insulting, because this is a native. Took one look around my garden and thought, "I wish I were dead."
And I'll stop with the fern.
Because the fern quite obviously stopped with me.